9/6/13

Matches That Time Forgot #57

I've outdone myself.  This match is so forgotten, I'm almost convinced that it was a dream I had last night.  A fever dream.  A wet fever dream.  From the tenebrous bowels of 1999-era WCW, I bring you Madusa versus Patty Stonegrinder.  Yep.  This actually happened.  Now, I want you to watch this match.  You'll have several questions, the most pressing being...who in the cobalt fuck is Patty Stonegrinder???  Folks, I'm about to blow your goddamn mind.  I mean, you literally won't believe what I'm about to tell you, even if you're a fairly well-seasoned wrestling fanatic.

Frumpy biker bitch Patty Stonegrinder competed at Wrestlemania X.  Read that sentence again.  Because it's true.  Guess what else?  It was a title match.  As a matter of fact, today's match that time forgot is a Wrestlemania rematch, only the names have been changed.  In 1994, Alundra Blayze defended her WWF Women's Championship against Leilani Kai, former tag team partner of The Fabulous Moolah.  It's a small world, ain't it?  From an artistic standpoint, 1999 was a pitiful year for the business (and that applies to both major companies), but this shit was hot.  Well, maybe this particular shit wasn't so hot.  We are reminded that David Flair will put the U.S. strap on the line later in the telecast.

I may have found the worst episode of Nitro ever.


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