Panels From Beyond the Grave #33

PINHEAD (#1, Dec 1993)

I was going to apologize for this review being late, but then I realized, I'm always apologizing for being a shitty writer.  Enough is enough, y'know?  Cut.  It.  Out.  You got it, dude!  The above image isn't the most accurate representation of the cover for Pinhead.  To be clear, I'm reviewing the first issue of the series.  You should see it in person.  Candy red, foil-embossed...she's a dream.  I never would have guessed that this comic was nearly 25 years old.  On a sidenote, did you catch the 25th anniversary edition of Raw?  I loved the Manhattan Center shows as a kid, and I don't understand why they couldn't hold the entire episode there.

"That's old news, Dom."  I know, I know.  Back to more relevant subject matter, a comic book from 1993!  I'm topical up in this bitch, like so many analgesics and ointments (consult your doctor if blood blisters develop).  Technically, Pinhead and other Cenobites are part of the MCU.  This is a Marvel/Epic title, Epic being a Marvel imprint.  I like Pinhead's chances against Thanos.  But I digress.  Hellraiser III: Hell on Earth had just come out and everyone's favorite metal-scalped Hell Priest was being pushed as a Freddy-level icon with the merchandise to prove it.  Pinhead, for instance, enjoyed a six-issue run, taking us on a field trip through time.

Oy, time travel.  It didn't work for the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, and in my opinion, it doesn't work too well for Pinhead.  First, the pros.  The artwork is bold and intense.  Any scenes depicting Hell are hellish indeed.  The detail is outstanding, and when you're drawing/shading the Lament Configuration, detail is key.  Can you appreciate how I wrote that as if I were an artist myself?  Ha!  I also dug the general vibe of the piece.  It feels Clive Barker-y.  For what it's worth, I wanted to get into the storyline, but muddled plot devices (or perhaps my own stupidity) made it impossible.  Again, I blame the time travel.

We bare witness to the creation of the Configuration.  I think.  Some force is threatening the hierarchy of Hell, and I suppose it's up to Pinhead to stop it.  I guess.  I think, I suppose, I guess.  In my defense, there are scores of characters and they all have weird names.  Towards the end of the issue, we are acquainted with a new passel of Cenobites who rally 'round Pinhead in the Old West.  This past incarnation of the titular demon is known as Arrowhead.  See, he has arrowheads in his...in his head.  Because Native Americans.  And uh, cowboys.  It's actually clever, so I shouldn't bash it.  I'm bashing the non-explanation for how that shit happened.

Those are my main questions.  What is happening?  How is it happening?  You don't want the reader to have those questions, especially after a single issue.  Certainly, you can't elucidate the mystery out of the narrative, but I should have a few morsels to lean on.  I hinted at this earlier, but it's possible that I'm too fucking dumb to comprehend Pinhead.  Without sounding self-important, I doubt it.