DESERT SHADOWS (2022)
In my review of Witchboard 2: The Devil's Doorway (I promise this is relevant), I made a random David Coverdale joke. Never in my weirdest dreams did I think that I would one day encounter a monster movie that credited Coverdale as a voice actor, but here we are. I swear to God. After doing some lightweight legwork, I found out that director Tyler Bourns manned the camera for a handful of Whitesnake videos. I can't even. Here, Coverdale is responsible for high-pitched creature shrieks, but you would never know it was him. Why was he hired??? I've heard of filmmakers creating roles with certain actors in mind. That happens. This...this doesn't happen. But what do we make of Desert Shadows, you may ask? At the risk of sounding sentimental, I took a gamble on this flick in the spirit of nostalgia. Y'know, back in the day, it was common to rent something just because it had a cool cover. I didn't have to spend four dollars on this b-debris (thank you, Tubi), so I'd say I came out on top.
Donnie's brother is snatched by a quadrupedal demon in the middle of the desert. What is this fiend, and what does a demure college professor know about it? The professor is played by Mitch Pileggi, which will intrigue fans of The X-Files. I'm one of those fans, and I'll admit that he adds a touch of class to the cast. He's basically in Skinner mode, only a tad more hostile. I'm resisting the urge to spoil story beats. The film gets a respectable amount of mileage out of very little, and no, we don't see much of the actual monster. The ending is exceedingly underwhelming. On the upside, there is plenty of pointless nudity. How pointless? It's on the same wavelength as the inclusion of David Coverdale, if that tells you anything. Decent gore effects nudge Desert Shadows into 3-Z'Dar territory. Recommended to fans of the high note in "Here I Go Again."
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