Blood Capsule #348

THE TOXIC AVENGER (2023)

I totally get why some people were looking forward to this film.  By the same token, I totally get why some people were dreading it.  Could a big-budget Toxie successfully emulate the D.I.Y. turbulence that fueled Lloyd Kaufman in 1984?  Having seen it, I think that director Macon Blair had his heart in the right place.  I'll even go one step further and say that casting Peter Dinklage was a stroke of brilliance.  Seeing a diminutive Toxie in all of his mop-wielding glory gave The Toxic Avenger a touch of...Charles Band-ism?  It's hard to quantify.  Whatever it was, it worked.  Here, everyone's favorite janitor is named Winston.  He wants to set a good example for his son, but before he gets a chance to do anything terribly noble, a pack of wild goons decides to jettison his 48-inch frame into a vat of neon chemicals.  I'll level with you.  I wanted to like this flick, but I'm not so sure that I did.  There are a couple of reasons for that, and this is where I'll point you in the direction of the second paragraph.

At several points during the 2025 (or 2023, depending on which website you're using as a reference guide) version of The Toxic Avenger, it strains to be vulgar.  It tries too hard to offend you.  The original was effortlessly blue.  It didn't try to be anything; it just was what it was.  As for the bloodshed, yes, the violence is over-the-top.  However, nothing is particularly shocking or rewind-worthy.  As silly as it sounds, I was expecting dead kids.  Where are all the dead kids???  What's more, the polished nature of Toxie '25 ends up working against the film, in my estimation.  It definitely doesn't feel trashy.  The acting is fine.  I dug Kevin Bacon as the villainous Bob Garbinger.  And again, Dinklage does a splendid job anchoring everything.  I'm going to have to go with 2.5 Z'Dars.  By all means, form your own opinion.  To tell you the truth, I've never been a huge Troma fan to begin with.  I do have a few sick Toxic Crusaders comic books in my collection, and no, you can't have them.