I KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST SUMMER (2025)
I have the World Series on in the background. It's irrelevant, but I want you to know that I hate the Dodgers. I tried to come up with a clever baseball metaphor for this movie. Alas, I got nothing. I guess I should start by talking about the original. I dig it! It's more of an "old school" slasher than the derivatives that followed in its wake. To be frank, I despise I Still Know What You Did Last Summer, and I feel pretty comfortable saying that I'll never watch it again. This re-quel...eh. I admit, I was curious. Would it simply rehash a proven formula? Well, kinda. A new group of almost-teens inadvertently causes a car to tumble down the side of a mountain. One year later, the bubbly Danica receives a portentous note at her bridal shower. It reads, "I can't believe how hot Jennifer Love Hewitt is at age 46. Good for her." Obviously, our characters are hooked and gutted by a maniac wearing a fisherman's rain slicker. No spoilers, but there are plot twists galore.
Actually, I'll start there. This movie has too many endings. The script seems to be in love with itself. I'm sure that writer/director Jennifer Kaytin Robinson had pure intentions, but the third act felt like an episode of Monday Night Raw. That's not a compliment. And yet, I enjoyed the vapid absurdity of it all. I was in the mood for a stupid slasher, so I didn't actively hate this flick. It was cute having Freddie Prinze Jr. and Sarah Michelle Gellar return to the...franchise? Does this count as a franchise? I don't see where they could go with another sequel. None of the main characters are interesting enough to carry a follow-up, and try as they might, the hook-handed villain just hasn't connected as a horror icon. I mean, have you ever seen little fishermen go trick-or-treating? If you have, how do you know they weren't dressed as the Gorton's fisherman? Got you there.
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