PREHYSTERIA! 3 (1995)
If you watch this junk on VHS (and if you have any self-respect, you will), you'll notice that unlike the first two Prehysteria! entries, there is no Videozone featurette after the movie. No cute "behind the scenes" fluff. That's by design, dear reader. By this point, Charles Band had stopped trying with this series. That's saying something, considering that Prehysteria! 2 saw a precipitous downturn in entertainment value. 3 is still entertaining, but for all the wrong reasons. Red flag number one? This flick is directed by David DeCoteau. Also, the special effects that salvaged the second film are...hold on, let me reach for my thesaurus. Ahem. The effects have collapsed. Withered. Deteriorated. Degenerated. Putrefied. Worsened. The tiny dinosaurs barely move, and in some painful instances, they don't move at all. What's more, the characters react to seeing them as if they are gawking at gerbils. No one is impressed by the sight of a prehistoric beast trudging about on a golf course. Yes, a golf course.
Technically, you can put Prehysteria! 3 in the same bracket as The Mighty Ducks or Little Big League. Ella is a junior golfer. When she discovers the bite-size dinos, she uses them to turn her dad's failing putt-putt course into a booming business. Yeah, that's the plot. The dinos don't really matter. Fred Willard is the dad, and he essentially plays Fred Willard. Whitney Anderson gets into the spirit as our lead brat. She's obsessed with Sean Connery for some reason. Jesus, Prehysteria! 3 is weird. The budget must have been miniscule. Oddly, there are no interior shots of Ella's house, and all of the action takes place at a country club. The pterosaur - y'know, the flying reptile - is never seen flying. Oof. The dinos end up serving hamburgers to golf patrons via the concession stand. For God's sake, they're called Dino-Burgers. If I were a dino, I would watch my back. Um, don't watch Prehysteria! 3.
No comments:
Post a Comment