7/26/11

Parts Unknown #69: Raw


I don't fully understand why last night's episode of Raw was booked the way it was, but it was fun and unpredictable. Unfortunately, there were just as many cons as there were pros.

PROS

~ While it was precariously pointless, the match between The Miz and Rey Mysterio opened the show on the right foot. More on this two-hour title reign later.

~ Is Jim Ross back for good? I hope so. It may not be anything new, but you will never hear me bitch about quality commentating.

~ John Morrison's triumphant return. I'll be honest; I've missed his nutty, reckless offense. JoMo vs. R-Truth at SummerSlam? Yes, please.

~ It took awhile for the crowd to wake up (maybe they thought they were dreaming...in which case, I can't blame them), but Zack Ryder's authoritative squash was entertaining television. He needs to be the next United States Champion.

~ The Kofi Kingston/Alberto Del Rio match. It was competent enough, but look, I'm beginning to tune out whenever Kofi is standing in the ring. Either spruce up his character or fire him. The guy has been running in place for two years now. If you're going to push him, do it already.

~ CM fucking Punk and his new entrance music. Fantastic ending.

CONS

~ What was the point of determining a new champion if Triple H resigned CM Punk? The bulk of Raw was null and void. They are rushing this storyline, and it's so obvious where all of it is heading. If Punk loses at SummerSlam, I will be supremely pissed.

~ I can't believe that I'm saying this, but the match between Dolph Ziggler and Evan Bourne was dull. They had no chemistry. And someone should tell creative that Dolph's "Mr. Perfect Jr." gimmick isn't going to get over.

~ I feel bad for Eve Torres. She can wrestle, but unless she shakes her ass, she will be jobbing to Tamina on Superstars in no time. Where is Kharma when you need her?

~ The Keith Stone segment. Fuck that shit.

Kudos to The Miz for banging Maryse. By default, he has earned the distinction of being known as the Broski of the Millennium.

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