9/24/22

Blood Capsule #128

GRAVE ROBBERS (1989)

I've always maintained that I don't review every film that I see.  In order to ramble on a certain topic, I need to have something to say.  There are movies, however, that refuse to meet me halfway.  Take Grave Robbers, for instance.  It's a Mexican slasher that you'll often find paired with 1985's Cemetery of Horror, a zombie romp directed by Ruben Golindo Jr.  Ol' Ruben also conducted this diapason.*  And it's...decent.  See, that's the problem.  This diabolic diversion is the cinematic equivalent of Bunny bread.  I dig Bunny bread, but outside of being a slice of leavened dough, what does it offer?  It's just fucking bread.  Grave Robbers is just a cut-and-dried monster mash.  Make of that what you will.

After the occult-flavored prologue, we meet our cannon fodder.  It's a pitiable prospectus of faceless characters who are stalked by the sprightly corpse of an irritable Satanist, a necromancer of sorts bent on...um, ending the world or some shit.  The death sequences are charming.  And I suppose that the production values are sharp, considering the modest budget.  It's nothing innovative.  Honestly, I'm surprised that I've wrested this many words out of such a routine flick.  Two and a half Z'Dars.  Four Z'Dars for my alliteration.

*It's a musical term.  Yeah, I don't know.


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