7/4/14

Galaxina


I have a loose review schedule that I try to adhere to, but every so often, my film selection process is incidental.  For example, I saw 1980's Galaxina mentioned on Facebook the other day, which prompted an internal dialogue.  "Hey, I've been meaning to watch that flick.  I'm in the mood for sci-fi cheese, so why not watch it now?"  I have bewitching hash slinger Mia Mayo to thank for the impulse of inspiration.  This was an interesting subject, as it's a blithe spoof with a tragic backstory.  Technically, the tragedy transpired after Galaxina wrapped.  Sizzling starlet Dorothy Stratten (the armed delilah on the poster) was murdered by her husband prior to the photoplay's premiere.

Why did I call it a photoplay?  Who uses that term?  Anyway, I'm sad to say that Stratten's life and death is more riveting than Galaxina.  There is a documentary on YouTube about the former Playboy playmate that I would recommend checking out in lieu of this William Sachs oddity.  I'm selling it awfully short, aren't I?  It does have redeemable qualities.  Certainly, the script deserves some scrap of credence for influencing mordant comedies to come, namely Spaceballs.  Both farces parody the "chestburster" scene in Alien.  Obviously, Star Wars tropology is ripe for the ribbing, although Galaxina limits its apery to the cantina sequence (here, we visit a bordello and a saloon that specializes in serving human meat).

Galaxina herself is a shapely robot aboard a police cruiser en route to a prison planet.  The crew's mission?  To retrieve the Blue Star, a puissant orb that gives its owner...um, powers.  Powers to do stuff.  Really important space stuff.  Yeah, the narrative is on the nebulous side, and if you want my honest opinion, the pace is sedentary until the third act.  On the upside, the infrared finale is entertaining, not to mention gorgeous.  The entire picture is enriched with lustrous cinematography.  It's also enriched with Ordric, a crabby red-hooded scallywag who steals the show.

As a comedy, let's just say that Galaxina isn't going to incite any laugh riots.  I was disappointed in how the title character is defalcated.  Hell, you could argue that she isn't even the main focus of the film.  What's with the "damsel in distress" bullshit?  Stratten plays a cool droid, but she has to be saved by measly mortal men from a biker cult.  Lame!  If you ask me, Sachs should have placed a stronger emphasis on Ordric.  And the rock eater.  Galaxina should have been a buddy cop actioner with those two knuckleheads.  Galaxina could be the villain!  By George, I've already written a treatment in my mind.

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