Parts Unknown #58: Smackdown

Meh. How is that for an intro?

PROS

~ The opening promos worked for one reason and one reason only: Sheamus. You get the sense that he knows his character inside and out. He looks comfortable. In less than two years, he has reached a level of confidence that Mark Henry hasn't been able to approach in over a decade. I'm stoked that he is the number one contender to The Viper's tainted championship belt. I have no doubt that I'm in the vast minority, but I can see Sheamus winning his third world title in the not-so-distant future.

~ The Cody Rhodes/Daniel Bryan match. If these two wrestlers square off at Capitol Punishment, they're going to steal the show.

~ The Great Khali's heel turn. First of all, I actually enjoyed his match against Kane. Somehow, The Punjabi Pisstake managed to keep from embarrassing himself (although most of the credit should go to Kane). Jinder Mahal has yet to strike out at the plate. I love it when a midcard program is expertly written.

~ I had reservations about Ezekiel Jackson's coquettish, wishy-washy run as a babyface. He has switched sides too many times. However, he seems to be making the best of a weak angle. You can't tell me that he isn't over with the crowd. What's more, he has made the body slam cool again. Now that takes talent.

~ A.J. Lee. I need more of her and less of the other chicks.

CONS

~ This wasn't an easy decision to come by, but I have to list the Sin Cara/Chavo Guerrero match as a con. There were just too many botches, and none of the kicks connected with enough oomph. Sin Cara whipped out his finisher in the corner of the ring, so he had to go for the cover instead of using his patented submission hold. Was that meant to happen? It's doubtful. He should have went for his sick flip off of the top rope. Don't get me wrong; I'm still in the Sin Cara fan club. And I still need to order that snazzy shirt.

~ Booker T calling out Michael Cole. Was that really necessary?

~ Kaitlyn is fucking awful. She was born to be a valet. Get her out of the goddamn ring.

~ I thought that Tamina was a face. Why is she tagging with Alicia Fox? Is she still fucking Santino? Has she buried the hatchet with The Uso's? What's going on?

I've typed up 58 of these things? Geez.