Dead Space

Roger Corman produced 1991's Dead Space.  It's a remake of 1982's Forbidden World, which was produced by...Roger Corman.  It's common knowledge that the man revels in the act of cannibalizing his own exploits.  Perhaps he gets sick joy out of it.  How sick am I to rent and enjoy these c-movies?  If you use IMDb reviews as your barometer, it would appear that Dead Space is unilaterally seen as residual sheathing left behind by Forbidden World, the high-class pick of the two Alien riffs.  I wish I could stand alone and volunteer an adversarial viewpoint, but in this case, the plurality of nerds is comme il faut.*

However!  I reserve the right to dig trash.  Dead Space is flimsy, but it's not THAT flimsy.  It can be digested as rattlebrained entertainment.  There was a helix of sci-fi/horror cheapies crapped out in the late 80's/early 90's, and you could say that this whirlpool trend continued into the tailpiece of the decade (that sounded too sexual).  I mean, we had Event Horizon and fucking Virus.  The former was divisive as shit, and I still haven't seen the latter.  I should break down and allow Jamie Lee Curtis to transmit bacteria onto my removable, magnetic tape videocassette.  Speaking of infectious agents (that was the kind of segue your parents would love), a virus has blighted a research facility on the planet Phaebon.  Why did they invent a bullshit planet???

Anyway, a distress signal reaches Marc Singer and his trusty robot pal.  Singer's character has a name, but I'm choosing to believe that he played himself.  It makes sense.  The robot is Tinpan, and guys, this fucking bionic borg is the heart of Dead Space.  The nucleus.  The anchor!  He is as fleshed out as much as he needs to be, his morals are verifiable (I'm talking "lawful good" here), and I felt something when he perished.  Don't give me grief over spoiler warnings.  You don't care.  You never cared for Tinpan, not like I did!  Welpers, I'm using slathers of exclamation points.  I know better.

The acting is fine.  Aside from Singer, Bryan Cranston plays a slightly mad scientist, though he doesn't become a true antagonist.  Of course, he's flippin' awesome.  The special effects are typically gooey, and as a millennial might say, I'm here for it.  The creature is essentially a Xenomorph Queen.  I can't defend cribbing, but again, I'm here for it.  I'm not proud of my taste; believe me.  Logically, I look down on plagiarism, but at the end of the day, it's a rubber monster.  It's tacky.  It's great.  I should be admitted into a rehabilitation clinic of some description.

Dead Space runs for 72 minutes.  Pacing is not a problem.  Plot holes are a problem, but they aren't dealbreakers.  It's minor league stuff.  This is a minor league flick, so I didn't mind meeting it halfway.  Oh, the asterisk?  I don't know.  It's Spanish.  I don't speak Russian.