Parts Unknown #60: Raw

Now we're talking! We're finally getting to a place where the future stars of the WWE are spreading their wings and taking flight.


~ The opening segment. Vince McMahon makes everything better, as does Stone Cold Steve Austin. I haven't been watching Tough Enough, so the drumroll announcement didn't mean much to me, but it acted as a springboard for a succession of entertaining promos. R-Truth has fucking arrived. Even John Cena was decent. I loved hearing the chairman of the board gnarling "Monday Night Raaaaaw" one more time. He should commentate a match or two. How sweet would that be?

~ The Santino Marella/Michael McGillicutty match. Hopefully, this will lead to a tag team title transfer. Were my eyes deceiving me or was Santino channeling the spirit of The Ultimate Warrior? That was rich.

~ Say what you want about Kelly Kelly (I know I have), but at least she uses her time in the ring to showcase a couple of inventive moves. I actually wouldn't mind if she became a champion.

~ The finish was lazy, but CM Punk and Rey Mysterio put on an outstanding match for television standards. It featured psychology, exceptional counters and a deluge of nearfalls. It's funny to think that I used to loathe Mysterio. Years back, he would refuse to lose to certain men, but it appears that he has softened over time. And you can't deny his raw talent. If WCW wasn't such a clusterfuck of a company, he could have had anywhere from five to ten world titles by now.

~ Hey, it's Zack Ryder! Yes, he lost, but be patient. He'll go places.

~ Booker T feuding with Jack Swagger? I'd sign up for that. Their match wasn't spectacular, but it was fun seeing Book back in action.


~ No Drew McIntyre? Ship him to Smackdown pronto!

~ The Bella Twins couldn't wrestle their way out of a womb. I fear that their cloddishness may be contagious. They make everyone around them look uncoordinated, even Beth Pheonix. They have no fucking clue what they are doing. Did they train at the Madison Rayne Dojo of Death?

~ Alberto Del Rio's unfunny, drawn out promo. I don't blame the crowd for falling asleep.

This was a solid Raw. It wasn't perfect, but it succeeded in developing key characters and coloring the card of the next PPV. We were also treated to an ample amount of wrestling. Bravo!

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