Parts Unknown #4: Impact

This week's Impact sucked. I guess I should be a little more verbose.


~ The mixed tag team match. I'm a big fan of all six people (especially Tara and Shannon Moore), and they did not disappoint. I like the way the girls were utilized. This was easily the match of the night.

~ I did like the ending. Matt Morgan has been penciled into the main event at Turning Point, and even though he probably won't win, I'm glad that he's in the title picture.


~ The Sarita/Velvet Sky match. Velvet is sexier than a human being has any right to be, but here, she was exposed as a sloppy wrestler. She was so stiff and telegraphed. Wrestling shouldn't look as fake as this match did. She needs Angelina Love at her side to make her look halfway competent.

~ The three-way match for the TV Championship. It was too short. Plain and simple.

~ The one-minute main event. You heard me. The main event lasted ONE MINUTE before Abyss grabbed an audience member. By the way, this whole deal with Abyss going after the fans is fucking ridiculous. Again, wrestling shouldn't look fake. It's too obvious that the audience members are plants. Any moron could figure that out. Does TNA expect viewers to believe that Abyss would wail on three or four schmucks in the audience without paying any consequences? Good Good.

~ Didn't Jeff Jarrett cut the exact same promo last week? Gee, I wonder if he's going to apologize to Samoa Joe. Give me a break.

~ Does every faction need to have internal strife? The Kazarian/Douglas Williams match wasn't bad, but it shouldn't have been booked in the first place. The dissension in EV2 is nauseating enough.

I'm done. Smackdown is coming on soon. In my Raw review, I said that it was the worst wrestling show on television, but after watching this week's Impact, I'm not so sure anymore. It truly sucked.

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