Parts Unknown #44: Raw

I was going to post a movie review tonight, but that can wait until tomorrow (and by tomorrow, I mean later today...the clock has struck midnight, so it's officially Tuesday). I need to write about Raw while it's fresh in my memory. This was an amazing go-home show. Almost every match on Wrestlemania's card was given a shot in the arm. Let's break this bitch down...


~ The brightest stars in the WWE were slated to appear on Raw, but which one would open the telecast? Triple H? The Undertaker? John Cena? The Miz? The Rock? Wrong on all accounts. The most important episode of 2011 began with CM Punk sitting in the middle of the ring with a microphone in his hand. Excellent choice, Vince! It's obvious that creative has big plans for Punk, and I was glad to see him front and center on a night when he could have been overshadowed.

~ The tag match between Edge/Christian and Alberto Del Rio/Brodus Clay. Were those double-team moves that I saw? Nice! I haven't seen those on Raw or Smackdown in ages.

~ I've been critical of the build-up for the match between Triple H and The Undertaker because...well, because it has sucked a zombie's scrotum. But tonight, that problem was rectified. The arrival of HBK was a welcomed addition to the promo. I can't put into words how well-written this segment was. I'm actually doubting whether or not the streak will remain in tact, and that's saying a lot. Great job, gentlemen.

~ The Jack Swagger/Jerry "The King" Lawler match. Here again, we have a feud that I've castigated in this very column. I'm not sure how it happened, but now, I'm looking forward to Michael Cole's in-ring debut at Wrestlemania. Maybe it was the fact that this particular segment didn't last 15 minutes. Maybe it was seeing Lawler chase Cole with a chair. Whatever the case may be, I'll bite. Kick his ass, King!

~ As expected, the match involving John Morrison, Daniel Bryan, Sheamus and Dolph Ziggler was a winner. I don't need to explain why.

~ Rock/Cena/Miz wasn't as captivating as Taker/HHH/HBK, but it was still good. I've asked this question before, but are we seeing the germination of a Cena heel turn? Let's hope so.

~ The Road Warriors for the fucking win! If I had it my way, they would be headlining the Hall of Fame induction ceremony.


~ The bar brawl. Who cares? I don't have a problem with celebrities being a part of Wrestlemania. It comes with the territory (Cyndi Lauper anyone?). I do have a problem with Ziggler and Morrison being hampered by Snooki. Those guys are on the precipice of becoming main event players, so they shouldn't be chained to a dopey marketing ploy.

All in all, this was the perfect lead-in to the Super Bowl of sports entertainment. I can't wait for Sunday!

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